Growing up in Nigeria the one thing that I
learnt from an early age was “Aggression”. It is a dog eat dog world out there
and every Nigerian is determined not to carry last in everything. Your training
in the science of aggression begins at primary school where if Tunde took your
biscuits you were expected to outsmart Tunde and get it back.
Surviving primary school meant you were ready
for phase two of your training, how to avoid being bullied at junior secondary
school and how to become the bully at senior secondary. And then you enter the
final phase how to navigate the murky waters of university where the ability to
be aggressive or in Nigerian terms “Be Sharp” is a baseline requirement.
But what happens when we enter the real world
and aggression really isn’t needed. Have we ever thought what it would be like
if rather than rushing for that bus we just queued up and got in one after the
other or if we just allowed a car to change lanes without thinking he/ she
thinks we are mugu’s. For one I know I would not have to paint the bumper of my
car every 6 months and I would not mind taking the bus, I really just cannot
handle people rushing like that is the last seat in the world.
I guess all of this comes with the Nigerian
hustle spirit, but have we considered the cost of this hustle spirit. When a
way of life is instilled in you from a very young age how can you learn to
switch it off when the situation requires it. I will give you an example, Mama
Segun and Mama Bola share a car. Mama Segun uses it in the morning, Mama Bola
in the afternoon. One day Mama Segun takes the car all day long and comes back
in the night, Mama Bola is livid; her “Be Sharp” senses have been activated cue
the aggression.
Now I know what most people would say “Yes now,
why did she do that” but have we ever
considered what exactly could have
happened. There are a billion possibilities but if we have our “Be Sharp”
senses activated how can we listen and most importantly understand. We should
all listen to understand and not to reply.
A very wise man once told me “It only takes
seconds” this was when he was teaching me to navigate the unique roads in
Lagos. I really think this is why my road incidents where limited to bumper
scratches and dents (Is it odd that all my dent incidents where from public
transportation vehicles, one from a taxi, another danfoe and there was the keke
nepe incident).
I really think as Nigerians we should practice
that, rather than trying to constantly outsmart the next person and be sharp,
why don’t we all accommodate one another and exercise a little patience. One thing
is for sure panel beaters would have more free time on their hands.
